Roman noodles, harmonicas, feathers, and Jesus.

The air is crisp on this cold night in Harrisburg and there is not even a cloud in the sky. There are some stars out as I wonder if there will be enough sandwiches for all the hungry. A few wait under the big concrete bridge for a glance of freedom and warmth as the Bethesda mission van rolls up. The crates come out, and the hot water gets placed on them for hot chocolate and roman noodle makings. Their long bushy beards, missing teeth, and smiles of hope ring true in my heart that I am home. I was created for this. Who could not love these men in their addiction and brokenness. Each has a story to tell which is so unique yet they are all the same. I struggle for words to say but then remember they are people too, not much different than I.

Larry is my favorite. With alcohol on his breath and stuff stuck in his beard, he plays his harmonica and sings his 70's songs as if he was performing in front of thousands. He always shares with me about how he has double frost bite on his toes and how he does not think he is going to make it. All I can do is pray. Larry soon falls over because he is so intoxicated then is walked back under the bridge to lay down only to start the next day begging for more money to feed his addiction. God loves Larry just as much has He loves me.

And Cherokee. I see feathers in his hair as if he was still on the reservation in New Mexico. His face does not show it but I know he longs for home again. His long dark hair and tinseled eyes touch my heart as he sings songs on his out of tune guitar. He has some things to take care of before he goes home. I've never seen him light up as he did tonight as he played the guitar. He was playing in front of thousands as well.

What dreams these men must have had. Most still have them, some have lost all hope. I see this huge hand from the ground desiring to grab them and keep them in their state but I also know all of heaven is watching for some lost sheep to return home to their Father.

As I look into the sky at the buildings towering around me, Cherokee sings one last song. He receives a simple yet joyful applause of the seven volunteers and humbly thanks us, as I see the face of renewed hope leaving for another cold night on the streets.

House stones and giants.

"There we saw the giants; and we were like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so we were in their sight.” Numbers 13:33

It's hard to believe that in less than a month I will be in my Obed-Edom. Over the past few weeks God has just birthed so much dream into this house. I'm learning that we have to fight for things that we really want. Getting this house has been like taking on a part time job. I'm facing the giants in the land that want to stop me at the gates from possessing what is rightly the Kingdoms. I've fought with everything I know and have learned in my seven years with the Lord. Sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is this dream. Knowing the dream is bigger than I, I know it's okay to feel so small among the demands of this great world.

Once issues are resolved, I continue to have the same giant come and throw the same stone in my path. This giant is money. Despite me tripping, falling, and having a few scrapes on the way, I must go on. When you see the face of Jesus nothing will stop you. This wasteland I'm going through to get to my Promise Land has not been very pretty. But what remains beautiful among these stumbling stones in the wilderness is my Jesus. His heart, to love a doubter who is a shaken and scared little girl like me. That's what a Father does.

I see my Promise Land and have already met people in my land who has the same heart. It's all going to be okay, it's going to be worth it all. All I continue to fall on is what is true. God keeps telling me that He will never leave me and that He is with me always. Knowing this shatters the many lies that have been lodged at me from the enemy. I know the enemy is mad. Good. He's stupid and defeated anyway. So in the words of Andrew Sherman, "Shove it!" I think laughter silences the enemy too :)

Possessing this land as I enter the gates of my city is such a pivotal moment for me right now. Please pray that I remain strong and strengthened in the Lord. This year I have already done many things which I have never done before. I might physically be the size of a grasshopper in comparison to this dream but the giants don't need to know that. What if I was the most giantest giant? What now huh?! I guess the most beautiful biggest person is Jesus, and He lives in me. That qualifies me to do anything, even to over come the giants.

My Obed-Edom is here.

I found a house. It's such a lovely little house on Vernon St. It's a place where the glory of the Lord will rest as well as those in Harrisburg city.

I was encouraged by a dear friend of mine (Shannon) just to give everything to the Lord a few weeks ago, including my list of what was going to be in the house. Two nights later I had a dream about a house that I felt in love with. I was very nervous because well it's a BIG thing and probably one of the most important decisions I've made in my life. In my dream I looked outside and there was a playground across the street. There were a lot of african american kids playing and single mothers. I was taken back and knew that the Lord wanted me to disciple these women, which I have never even though of. When I woke up I remembered that I previously looked at a house about 2 months ago with a playground across the street but just wasn't quite feeling it. I shared the dream with this dear friend of mine and she encouraged me to go back and see this house. So I did.

I prayed a lot and asked for a lot of wisdom and tried not to be too anxious or even over spiritualize the dream.. I just wanted to know if it was the house or not. Well I went into the house and the owner was previously working on the house and left the Christian music blaring. My eyes watered up and I just knew and grew excited. I keep thinking about this house. I also think about the 13th street house that I felt I lost about 2 months ago. I now realize that with the 13th street house there were so many condemned houses in the area that there were hardly any people walking by because the block was kinda dead except the normal busy 13th street traffic.

I have settlement March 14th. I see my Promise Land. I'm so blessed to be a vessel of the Lord to be poured out for all people. I just want to be used. This is such a quick birthing of a vision because it was only October when he put it on my heart to buy a house. Now, six months later I will be a homeowner. I really believe this quickness in the spirit is just evidence that revival over the earth will soon break forth.

We must continue to remain in Him. I in Him and Him in me. What if we did everything God tells us to do? Can you just imagine what would happen? How many lives would be affected? We have to remain FAT- faithful, available, teachable. I wrestle with each of those words almost daily. But it brings me closer to God. I can begin to see His face and He gives me part of His heart to carry and to be a voice to this generation. I want to be that voice where there is none and be love where there is no love. That's the gospel and that's what I am.

Creating invisible walls and walking through them.

"For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ"
2 Corinthians 10:3-5

I'm reading The Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson and it's an incredible story of a nobody named Ordinary in pursuit of a dream that is bigger than the world he lives in. When he came to the border to leave Comfort Zone it says fear kept growing and Ordinary took a step forward "right through the invisible wall of fear."

God gave me such a revelation in my life how we can create these invisible walls in our lives. Fear, rejection, depression, all those emotions and walls we create and struggle through are invisible. It's invisible. Circumstances and our human nature lead us to create these walls in our minds and hearts.

Seeing is believing. When we see things, we believe them. When we see things in our dreams, in the supernatural, it happens in the natural. It's called faith. The Lord is showing me that just as we have the potential to create good in the natural by our thoughts and beliefs, we also have the potential to create things that can hinder us. These walls can become so real to us in our minds that it becomes a reality here on earth. We create invisible walls in the natural. Ever fear the worst and then it happens? Just as belief creates things unseen, so can fear. We can role play in our minds the worst thing that could happen and think what if we did this or that. We create that invisible wall preventing us from going forward. The best things about it is that the wall is invisible and despite the wild stories we can create in our minds the Word of God is still stronger. We just have to believe.

Fear of anything immobilizes us. We must continue to abide in the living God for perfect love casts out all fear. Wilkinson says, "Courage is not the absence of fear; rather it's choosing to act in spite of fear. You could say that without fear, you can't have genuine courage." We must do the very thing we fear. I feared buying a house, so I bought a house. Maybe you fear starting your own business, so overcome that fear and start your own business. After all, if the wall is invisible, how is it going to stop you?

Sometimes I believe our minds can be our worst enemy. Yes, there is a war going on between the light and darkness, but sometimes I think the biggest war is within us, between us and God. God, I want to give you 'that', but I still want to hold on 'this' just for a little while longer. Our minds are so powerful yet they must be influenced by the heart of God before the dream becomes a reality. We must believe the Word of God over any and all circumstances in our lives. We must believe Truth over lies. I must let Truth prevail always. It's the only thing that keeps me alive.

It's time to walk children of God. To walk through walls we have created in our minds. There are gates in these walls and on the other side awaits destiny. You will prevail for the Truth is in you. Take a step forward through your invisible wall. Find me waiting with more of what you were looking for on the other side.

Raising the dead.

"By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that the things which are seen were not made of things which are visible."
Hebrews 11:3

God makes me laugh sometimes. He showed me that He is greater than my lack of faith or fear. We need to just simply do what He says. We need to do what we know in order to know what to do.

The science teacher next to my room put her gerbil in one of those balls to run around in the classroom while the kids weren't there. One of the teachers came in and kicked the ball really hard thinking it was a beach ball. As it was kicked, the lid came off and little Nebby flew out and smacked against the wall and laid motionless. When the gerbil came to it really wasn't moving but its heart was racing so fast. Over the next minute a few more teachers gathered around and Nebby started moving his arms a little but his heart rate dropped significantly to the point where it was dangerous. Blood started coming out of his nose and we knew he was a gonner because there was internal bleeding. Then his heart stopped and stopped moving then pooped (which is a sign an animal is dead.)

As he was laid out on the table and one of the teachers said, "Emilie do something!" What was I supposed to do?! Without thinking I just laid my hand on the little guy and said, "In the name of Jesus I command the spirit back into this animal!" Within five seconds, boom he was alive! The teachers screamed because we knew he was dead before! It wasn't the normal being raised from the dead where the fingers start moving, then toes, then it starts breathing, but it was immediate and it ran all around! Ha ha! I was asked to tell the story over and over again giving Jesus all the glory in this public school.

I don't know what I was thinking when I asked God to raise a gerbil from the dead. I don't think I was thinking. Sometimes I think we think too much where we actually think who God truly is away. I didn't really expect it like, yes I know he will be alive again, but just did what was in me to do. I mean why not? What's the worst that could happen, he dies? Or God could just show up and do what is normal in the kingdom. I honestly do not count myself as a woman of great faith but I do know the Father loves me. It's really all about Jesus. Without love we are nothing. We can raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, give everything away to the poor, and give our bodies but without love we are nothing.

I thinking there's something significant in acting in the moment God speaks. A moment of hesitation causes doubt to flood in and we could miss walking through that window of opportunity and miss the miracle. We are supposed to have an expectation in things that are not seen to be seen. Gods words spoke this earth into existence. The invisible becoming visible. I believe that is what happened with Nebby. God's words spoke the gerbil's invisible spirit back into him. The evidence of this was something seen, he became alive. We have resurrection power flowing on the inside. It must get out by our voice. Speak, speak, speak words of life over all dead situations and bring forth life beloved of God! In doing so, you bring heaven to earth.