I'm naive and love it.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18

Over the past few months I have been called very naive by quite a few people when sharing the vision of Harrisburg. It sounds all good, helping the poor, blessing people, BBQ's, until I tell them the specific area in Allison Hill where I want a house. I've been called f'n crazy and everything else the enemy can do to try to pierce my heart and shaken me. Sometimes I step back and think, wow, what the heck am I doing?! Then I think on the goodness of the Lord and rejoice again for what is to come.

It is frustrating at times to get knocked over here and there but just as long as I pick myself up and recognize the tactics of the enemy and overcome. I'm learning that we must fight and persevere for our dreams. As Lou Engle says, "Your dreams will drive you into the wilderness." It's not supposed to be a cake walk but there are sweets on the way. Our dreams will cost us everything. What else where you going to spend your life on?

I was listening to a Life Center message by Heidi Baker where pastors in the US where saying that she was the most naive woman they ever met. Yet, that she should never change. That's encouraging knowing the massive revival Mama is leading through the world by simply stopping for the one.

I may be incredibly naive being a white mid 20's girl going into the line of fire where drug dealers inhabit some of the hundreds of condemned buildings, where single mothers cry out and can barely keep it together, where the poor struggle to keep warm and their bellies with some food, and where the addiction runs rampant with drugs, sex and alcohol. What a beautiful place to be a light in this dark little world of Harrisburg. The power of darkness has been destroyed by His death, so what is there to fear?

I will finish well. Stuff happens but God is always alive and well. As Mama Heidi says, we need to look at the face of trouble and laugh while pushing and believing for victory. We are in a revival that will never end. I might have a few bruises but I will keep running. Yes I'm naive but God made me naive. I trust in Him. If I was not naive I would be fearful and fear chokes me and makes me immobile. I pray for wisdom every day.

I feel like I am laboring now with this promise of the city. My heart is now despirate to go and move into the city as I fall in love with everyone on the streets, rich and poor, lovely and unlovely. Despiration moves the heart of God. It's all for Him, it's all for Him. It's coming, I can feel it. The anticipation and expectation is building.

I will joyfully continue to be naive and dream my young girl dreams. That's how stuff happens in the Kingdom.

The homeless finding a home in my heart.

"for I was hungry and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in;I was naked and you clothed me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me." Matthew 25:35-36

She wore a Giant bag on her hair and another over each of her feet. Her layered clothes, missing tooth, big eyes, and rough sarcasm were there to meet me on Willow street in Harrisburg tonight. Her name is Mrs. Johnson. She was one of the many who we visited tonight with Bethesda's Mobile Ministry. Blankets, hoodies, socks, and jackets were given out as needed. The coffee was hot, powered creamer to follow, and hot water was used to make the ramen noodles to give out as hot soup. Lunch bags of goodies filled their arms and bottled water was a treat.

The seventy year old woman swears she's married to Mr. Johnson, yes the former president, as she then changes to says she is Laura Bush. Even talking to the other homeless, it seems some just lose their minds in the twisted world of poverty. Another younger girl about my age is on her 6th child and the kids are living with their daddies. Her one child's name is Emily and cannot remember how she spells her name until she lifts up her arm where a pooh-bear has her child's name written on it. How can you heart not break. Love looks like something. Mrs. Johnson was on her third cup of coffee and a big smile when we left her.

"Thank you Lord," continued to come out of Larry's joyful yet broken heart. His bearded face, loss of hearing, runny nose, and stained jacket were evidence to him being on the street for quite a long time. He played the most beautiful Christmas songs on the harmonica as he says God really likes it as he says it does something special for him inside. As Larry began to tell me his story my heart wanted to whale yet there was so much joy that came out that it was could only be expressed in laughs and love. He began to cry and told me he does not think he's going to make it. The cold was pressing in my lungs and the rain turned to ice as it hit the ground. When he cannot hear what I say he says, "Yeah, the Lord is shining down on us." We were sent off by an oldies song passionately sung by Larry that night.

I struggle to understand why all this happens. I can take a spiritual and economical stand on why people are homeless but why are they still homeless? What about Larry who loves Jesus yet he's been on the streets for over 15 years? God do you remember him? Of course He does but I still struggle to understand poverty and why it seems that most of the world is cursed with living without the bare essentials. Then again, who are they serving? I don't know. Tonight was the first time I saw the US in a fragile state; a state that is so contradictory to what we stand for, freedom. How many are locked into bondages of running in circles and dieing from it? Is this truly the land of the free and home of the brave? Oh God heal our land! I knew in my head the needs and desperation of our nation but tonight now I know know it in my heart.

In the bitter cold Larry warmed my heart. Look where he is yet he is still thanking Jesus. I can be honest and say I don't know how strong I could be to thank you for that many years and still be on the streets. Challenging. I felt like I was in Mozambique again, a feeling that I have longed for since leaving. I was alive again! I was created to love the poor and the poor I will love. This is who I am. The greatest thing is that despite the darkness which is engulfing the lives of many, "the Lord is still shining down on us."

Restoring the vision

I don't know why it's been so difficult to pick myself up from this house that I had the door shut in my face on. My dear friend Jonathan sent amazing encouragement and prophecy about the house. I wanted to share it and agree with it.

"Some houses even to come may SEEM like the right one, but know that when God says, "This is My house which I have given to you to take care of and to make a dwelling place for the lost," It will be more obvious than you can even imagine. And I pray now, and prophecy now, that you will KNOW without doubt whatsoever that it will be the house for you because when you walk into the front door of the House the Lord has in store, His Spirit will flood your heart and you will literally be brought to your knees because His glory will fill the house so much that He will say to those present at the time, "You are on Holy ground!" "

My girlfriend Sharon adds, "God is able to give you much more than this!"

I recieve and believe it Lord! Like I said before, the only words I heard from Jesus was, "Keep dreaming." So I am. I am claiming everything that I saw in the house which is no more, for the house which is to come. My house in Harrisburg will have all this and more :)

1. Allison Hill area

2. Four plus bedrooms

3. At least 1.5 baths

4. Offstreet parking

5. Move in condition

6. Large kitchen

7. Large family room

8. Visable place from the street for a BBQ for outreach

9. Security system

10. Areas outside to dance and worship

11. Under 90K

12. Washer and dryer

13. Hook up for central air

14. Resting place as it will carry the glory of the Lord.

There ya have it Jesus. I believe you want to restore all and more that was lost. That's who you are, love, and that's all you are about. I thank you for that.

The painting above is by Lorraine Stiefenhofer called "Dreaming in Utero."
This image is a copyrighted work of Lorraine Stiefenhofer © 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008
Inscape Art