Miscarrying a house

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, But when the desire comes, it is a tree of life."

Proverbs 13:12

My heart and vision was in a house on 13th street. Everything seemed perfect. Then I lost it. Another buyer gave a cash offer with no contingencies. I feel like the rug has been pulled from underneath me. What happened? Is this a time to rise and stand and say "No that's mine and I'm fighting for it," or "God has something way better," which I can't imagine but need to believe. It's really hard.

I know those who grow strong are those who wait on the Lord. I want to be strong. I look at David's life as he was appointed by Samuel to be king 10-13 years before he actually became king. And during that time, look at all the battles he had. It was character building. That's what I believe this is. I have faith that this place could still be mine but if it's not I have faith that there is a better one. I should make a list of what I want in a house.

It's been difficult looking as I face compromise all the time. This one little 17103 zip code I'm looking in there are like zero houses that I would remotely be interested in buying. Why not just move to 4th street and buy a beautiful house for the same price yet with marble top counters, stainless steel appliances, hardwood floors, central air, a beautiful little porch out front? I'm reminded that is where the poor are not.

It's a struggle, but despite what everyone tells me at school and even some friends, I will not compromise. I can't. It's the Kingdom. Wow, if we only knew the repercussions of bad decisions now we would not do them. I need to be with the poor. The drunks, the drug dealers, the condemned houses, and the lost. That's where my heart is. I have only heard one thing from God with all of this, "Keep dreaming." So I'm going to keep dreaming. Maybe I wasn't dreaming big enough and settled with the house, I don't know.

All I can do is enter back into His rest.